Feel More Secure & Increase Mastery…
The Art of Constellations:
Intuition, The Field,
& Finding Resolutions
Online Group Video Conference Learning Program
2018 Dates TBA
The Art, the Science…and the Vulnerability
All healing modalities are a combination of art and science. An acupuncturist has to learn about meridians, and theories of chi flow, but it takes years of practice to know where to start with a specific patient symptom. An NLP practitioner knows about the five questions of the Outcome Frame and how to anchor precisely, but they still have to understand the belief map of their specific client, and form a plan on how to help them change it.
Constellation Facilitators are no different. We learn about the Orders of Love, classic constellations sentences and formats, and some basic psychology. But then we are still faced with figuring out the most important information, how to set up a constellation, and most challenging of all, how to read the movements of the Field so that we can guide the constellation to a good and true outcome for the client.
But constellators have an extra challenge that the other healers don’t face: We are doing it all in real time, in front of a group, without knowing ahead of time what the heck is going to show up. We can be forgiven if even the best of us from time to time get performance anxiety. And for beginners, the vulnerability of our practice can be an enormous block to “beginner’s mind” openness to what is happening, so that we can learn, try things, be messy, and get better.
I’ve always said: facilitating really isn’t that hard. Truly, it isn’t! Most people can do it pretty well once they learn the basic concepts. What’s hard – sometimes excruciatingly hard – is doing it in front of people when we don’t have much practice yet and we aren’t sure of ourselves. This leads many newly-trained facilitators to avoid doing the work, and this is too bad, because it’s only by practice that we get better.
We’ve all Felt that Moment…
We’ve interviewed the client, and set up the representatives. Some things have started to happen. But then what? What do we do? How do we help the constellations come to a resolution, and provide an outcome for our client?
It’s time to “Read the Field.” It’s time for our intuition to show up, tell us what to do, and make it possible for us to guide the constellation to a good and true resolution for our clients.
We all know anything that sounds like “intuition” requires a kind of relaxation, but as we feel the pressure of the group and our professional obligation to our client (and perhaps with visions of our “perfect” trainers in our head, making confidence-sapping comparisons), the last thing we feel is relaxed. We tense, we worry, and we do one of two things: we give up, or we force ourselves to do SOMETHING.
But what if “that moment” was just fine, just what we needed? What if “not knowing” was at the heart of the practice? What if we there are skills that allow not-knowing to give us what we need to move forward into good resolutions?
The Big Constellations Secret? Every single facilitator, even the most experienced, feels like they have no idea what they are doing at least once a constellation. The only difference between the expert and others is that we welcome the arrival of not-knowing as a friend ready to give us the gift we couldn’t have planned or expected. And then, in some ways, the facilitating really starts…
The Skills of Not-Knowing…
or, is Intuition Real?
So many healing arts practitioners – in and out of constellations – complain about their problem with intuition. We have a strong narrative about intuition, and how important it is for all kinds of healing work. But I admit, I am a bit skeptical.
First, let me say: I do believe in a non-physical reality (whatever that means!). I believe in what some people call “the transpersonal.” There is something beyond what we can currently quantify scientifically, and it’s present and incredibly important in day-to-day human life. It shows up in ordinary spiritual experience, in how poets know a poem is “true”, in our instinct when we know someone is about to cut us off while driving, and much more.
But I’m not sure it helps us to call that knowledge “intuition,” leaving so many people who feel they aren’t very spiritual or psychic or able to “read energy” feeling like that they can’t be very good at it. But if intuition isn’t the real issue, what can we do to get better at facilitating?
How Intuition is Like Skiing
Professional Skiing, and all high level sports, are an expression of “muscle memory” and “implicit knowledge.” We don’t say “That skier is really intuitive.” We say “That skier is really skilled.” And, although there are people who take to skiing more naturally than others, we assume there was a lot of learning, coaching and practicing (and failing) on the way to the skier’s excellence.
However, it’s true the skier often can’t say what they are doing when they do it. This is where muscle memory and implicit knowledge come in. The experience is going so fast – information (visual, sensual) is arriving too quickly to track consciously. And yet, the skier skis competently.
A good facilitator is like a good skier. Years of practice, integrating specific skills that were broken down and then put together into a whole, leads to expert skiing. It’s NOT intuition. It’s learning the skills and practicing them.
And yet, it does seem like the Field is more mysterious than a mountainside (although try to convince a skier of that!). You can see snow, trees, moguls, dips, rocks. Can you see the Field?
Seeing and Interacting with the Field –
How to Become a Magician
We can work with the Field effectively – which grows our ability to respond “intuitively” to the constellation and support expert resolutions – by applying concrete skills. Not so much step-by-step in the sense of “first do this, then that, then that.” But more like taking a step, checking that, and then another step based on that, and then checking again. It reminds me more of rock climbing than going through a checklist (including turning around and going back the way we came when we notice a dead end – it happens!).
It is sensible and rational, but it can’t be turned into a cookie cutter recipe. Thank goodness! That would take away all the fun!
What are some of these learnable steps?
♦ Deep & slowed-down observation
♦ Referencing the Orders of Love as a source of insight into what’s going on.
♦ Referencing other useful frameworks, like Trauma & Attachment Theory, World History, Energy Work
♦ Inquiring with the representatives, at the right time.
♦ Trying things and seeing what happens.
♦ Noticing your own feelings and reactions.
♦ And most important, staying connected to (or re-connecting with) your client.
If we apply these intentionally throughout a constellation, we will be surprised at what we notice, and others will begin to think we’re magicians. But we’re not. We’ve just gotten very, very good at unconsciously noticing what is going on. It’s what I call Systemic Intelligence.
Is this Course for You?
There are really only two qualifications for joining this course:
1) You’re a trained constellation facilitator, on your way to becoming one, or an experienced alternative healing practitioner with some familiarity with constellations who wants to integrate this into their work. Yes! Since working with the Field and intuition are relevant to a wide variety of healing arts, so as long as your work overlaps in some way with constellations (broadly understood), you are welcome.
2) You want to expand your skills so you can deepen your service to your clients.
Some specific people who are an especially good fit:
♦ People who are really struggling with that “middle bit” of constellations.
♦ People who self-identify has not having good intuition.
♦ People who feel fairly confident, but want to take the next level dive into perceiving the Field and moving into “unconscious knowledge.”
♦ People who want more practice in a safe, non-judgmental environment where you can get messy and try new things with constellation peers.
The Unexpected Benefits…
My facilitator learning philosophy: We are not meant to become identical facilitators. Becoming a masterful facilitator means becoming more and more ourselves, and owning our specific genius in this work, whether it is more emotional or intellectual, verbal or quiet, etc. You are at your best for your clients when you can be your best You while working the Field.
Meet your Trainer:
I am a trained Family Constellations and Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) Practitioner. This means I lead intense change work when the causes of our difficulties are unconscious. I’ve worked with thousands of clients over the years.
I received my initial training from NLP Marin in 2008. Since then I’ve trained with a wide variety of Family Constellations trainers: Dan Booth Cohen, Francesca Mason Boring, Jane Peterson, Heinz Stark, William Mannle, Jan Jacob Stam, Sarah Peyton, Gary Stuart, Vlado Ilic, and many others.
I organized the 2015 North American Systemic Constellations Conference in San Diego, I trained with Bert and Sophie Hellinger in Mexico City, and I attended the international Constellation Intensive in Bernried, Germany. I have supported the work of the International Systemic Constellations Association (ISCA), and I presented at their conference in Croatia in 2016. I am also the founding organizer for the West Coast Constellations Intensive, a new event highlighting the best trainers on the West Coast. I am a regular contributor to The Knowing Field, the English-language journal of Systemic Constellations Work.
I have been in private practice since 2009, working with individuals and couples, applying Family Constellations principles and practices in a wide diversity of situations: marital trouble, depression, addiction, fertility issues, food problems, anxiety, employment and money challenges, and much more. I lead a constellations group in Berkeley that has been meeting every 2-3 weeks for eight years. At the same time, I’ve led many short workshops and longer change work programs and trainings.
I am also an ordained Episcopal minister, and have worked in the tender and personal place where spirituality and day to day life meet for over twenty years.
Finally, I am a skilled facilitator and group leader, and nothing gives me more joy than feeling groups come together to bring deep transformation for everyone.
The Details:
When: Dates TBA
Where: We will meet via high quality online group video conferencing (see more below).
What: In each class we will spend time doing…
♦ instruction
♦ group exercises
♦ doing constellations with each other
♦ receiving feedback and coaching
♦ discussion and questions
♦ between class assignments
Early Bird Deadline: TBA
Premium Version of the Course
For those of you who want a bit more personalized, customized guidance, I am offering a premium version of the course. It includes one hour with me, on the phone or a video conference, to do one of two things:
Business Model Coaching: How do you plan to offer constellation services to reach your financial goals? Do you want to lead workshops? Have a lot of 1:1 sessions? Offer regular Family Constellation gatherings? All of the above? In this hour of coaching, we’ll take a look at what you most like and want to do, and develop a rough plan for how you can build a practice that will meet your financial goals.
Facilitator Coaching: What are your main fears about being a practitioner? What most has you confused or not fully engaged? In this hour of coaching, we’ll find out what the main obstacles you have to being the best facilitator you can be, and develop a plan to integrate the growth and healing you need going forward.
One hour of coaching with me is normally $150, and as part of the premium version, you save $50.
(And you may add as many of these discount coaching sessions to the course as you like.)
2017 Prices
Early Bird Registration:
Regular Option – $485
Premium Option – $585
Late Registration:
Regular Option – $535
Premium Option – $635
Refund Policy: Full refund until 48 hours before the course starts, minus a $50 admin fee. Less than 48 hours or no shows, no refund of deposit. If a registrant withdraws during the course, no refund of payments made up to time of withdrawal, but final installments will not be due.
A Note about the Video Conferencing:
This program will be conducted on-line. So the platform we use is very, very important. All video conferencing will use Zoom, a high quality, very reliable and, most important, easy-to-use platform. No technical knowledge is required.
It allows for full interactivity, as well as “meeting room” breakouts which make small group exercises possible. For more information, go to Zoom.us. There is no extra cost for participants to use Zoom. It does require reliable internet access and a webcam. If these are not available (or there is a technical problem for one of the workshops), there is a phone-based option to participate by audio.
So, if you are ready to expand your practice, help more people and grow your business, click here…
 
 
On the Fence?
I understand. It’s an investment, and you want to make sure it’s right for you. Please contact me as soon as possible with your questions to see if this training is a good match for your constellation learning and growth.